Classic Collision Atlanta #317

Posted on 19. Aug, 2015 by in Classic Collision Atlanta

4/29/13

Yesterday, I decided to begin watching sermons. …because, in the past…I’d watch a sermon…and sure as s—…..whatever I was dealing with that day…the minister seemed to be reading what was on my mind. Kinda freaky.

Today seemed to be different. I feel like I have lost all of my zest. All I seem to think about is…what will happen next. Well, the Devil never sleeps and I have to remember that.

Its easy to say that I should live every last minute to the fullest. That’s kind of hard to do when you think that every move I make…is being monitored.

Unable to pick up anything that was being said….I recall the term backsliding being used in the beginning and in the end of the sermon.

God told me not to sleep with married men anymore….and he allowed me to see why. Just before I was raped…Manfred paid no attention to the severity of my pleas and moved forward, with only his self gratification in mind.

Why is it that Manfred felt that his backsliding was so significant…when he told me that his wife was sick…

When I backslid for four years and nearly committed suicide over all the things that I had done…because I felt like I was losing my mind and trying desperately to find someone to save me from Manfred and what it was causing me to do to myself….it didn’t mean anything to him…his answer to the problems that he has caused is,  killing me.

Backsliding is enough to kill a person….and those past actions are what lead me to feel the way that I felt, yesterday. All I can do is get this mess out of my system. I cannot take responsibility for those of you who cannot accept the fact that….

Your husbands chase women…every chance they get…and you’re all just pissed because I blew the whistle. Its always easier to blame the woman….and this will teach men to listen to a woman…when she says “NO!”

There are people who get off on hurting others…and they will never grow out of it.

When we go after what we want…from others…with no regard for what it might do to them….it doesn’t end when you finish getting what you want.

Manfred you’re upset because his life has been nothing but one big backslide. Why me? When someone tells you that what you are trying to get out of them, could destroy their life!!! Does that mean nothing to you, Manfred?

There are things that I did during those fours years…that I will never do again. I should have never been put in that position. That has set me back, big time. Oh well, all I can do is wake up tomorrow…and try harder.

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